Monday, June 29, 2009

Gone too soon... tribute to MJ


Gone too soon... tribute to Michael Jackson

If the media calls me weird, what word would the media have for so many things going on around us,' Michael Jackson asked his friend, the holistic guru and best-selling author Deepak Chopra. 'People think my behavior is weird. Isn't the world more weird?'

Chopra remembers how, many years ago, after an exhausting performance in Bucharest, Jackson sat backstage with Chopra chatting about Sufi poetry. Tagore soon joined the list of writers Jackson admired. "He was reading a poem by Tagore when we talked the last time, just about two weeks ago," Chopra said

Recently when Jackson and Chopra chatted at the former's request to discuss the lyrics for a new composition, the singer and performer talked about creating a spiritual relationship with the nature. "It was like, we ought to look at the world as the extension of ourselves," Chopra mused.

And yet Chopra confesses, he had watched with sadness, Jackson's inability to overcome his deep psychological problems, and even as he remembers Jackson for his humanity and exuberance, he adds that he had felt the tragedy lurking behind the singer for a long time.

"And that is why I wrote in my blog my heartfelt feelings," Chopra added. He wrote: 'Michael Jackson will be remembered, most likely, as a shattered icon, a pop genius who wound up a mutant of fame. That's not who I will remember, however. His mixture of mystery, isolation, indulgence, overwhelming global fame, and personal loneliness was intimately known to me. For 20 years I observed every aspect, and as easy as it was to love Michael -- and to want to protect him -- his sudden death yesterday seemed almost fated.'

He sees in Jackson's troubles life lessons for celebrities. Jackson, he says, became a victim to the image the media crafted, and fell prey to doctors who were merciless in the pursuit of their high living. 'He was surrounded by enablers,' Chopra writes on his Website, 'including a shameful plethora of MDs.'

"Addiction is the number one disease of the civilization," he mused, as he discussed Jackson's dependence on painkillers. "You can't blame the addict but instead, we ought to look into the complex situations that create addicts. Addictions have cost the lives of many people in the entertainment industry. Jimi Hendrix and Heath Ledger among them. Addiction cost Michael dearly. And the ravages of addictions just won't stop unless we seriously address the root causes, and make sure the medical establishment won't make the situation worse by its prescription drugs.

"With hindsight, one could say this could have been done or he could have behaved differently or sought different advisers. But the situation (with Jackson) was incredibly complicated," he added.

Recent studies have shown in the case of adults who were physically or sexually abused as children, a number of intense psychological problems lead to trauma and illnesses, he added. In some cases, the pain is in the mind but the victim feels as if he is undergoing intense physical pain. Often, people like Jackson, who had a traumatic childhood, undergo a lot of self-loathing and shame, he added. 'They think of all the bad things that happened to them in their childhood and in adult life, and they ask themselves, what did we do to deserve this?'

Even success cannot help them overcome the self-loathing and shame, unless they go for holistic healing. But it has to be done consistently

Chopra's children, Gotham and Malika, adored Jackson, and in return, he responded in a childlike way. Jackson had also visited the Chopra home near San Diego.

'He declared often, as former child stars do, that he was robbed of his childhood,' Chopra wrote in his blog. 'Considering the monstrously exaggerated value our society places on celebrity, which was showered on Michael without stint, the public was callous to his very real personal pain. It became another tawdry piece of the tabloid Jacko, pictured as a weird changeling and as something far more sinister.'

Was Jackson's compulsion with cosmetic surgery a form of self-mutilation, Chopra wondered. "And then the media calls this compulsion bizarre," he added. "The behavior (of the person under media scrutiny) then becomes even more bizarre It is a very tragic situation."

'Unbounded privilege became another toxic force in his undoing. What began as idiosyncrasy, shyness, and vulnerability was ravaged by obsessions over health, paranoia over security, and an isolation that grew more and more unhealthy,' Chopra wrote in his blog. 'When Michael passed me the music for that last song, the one sitting by my bedside waiting for the right words, the procedure for getting the CD to me rivaled a CIA covert operation in its secrecy.'

The most tragic thing that ever happened to Jackson was getting trapped in a web of prescription drugs, Chopra said.

Chopra, trained in Western medicine, has for many years criticized the medical establishment for doling out prescription drugs. He was reminded of an interview with India Abroad over 20 years ago where he had declared that the drug problem in America was not created by Colombians or Mexicans but doctors who liberally doled out prescription drugs.

"That continues today, and even very young children are given loads of prescription drugs," he said. "This is very shameful. Michael became a victim to this phenomenon.

"Some doctors are clearly narcissistic," he said. "Some of them develop codependency with the patients." He called them 'designer doctors' who 'just won't let their patients go.'

And the patients in turn start believing that not getting the prescribed drug 'would be suicidal,' Chopra added "In fact, the drugs make your condition worse and this was also the case with Michael."

Jackson's dependency with prescription drugs could have started over a decade ago when he had been sued for sexual molestation of a young boy. Though he would be exonerated in the court, he suffered quite a bit of trauma, and began believing he was physically suffering too. He even asked Chopra for prescription drugs in 2005 and the holistic guru flatly refused. When Chopra pressed him over the dependency, Jackson became quite agitated, and then very defensive.

"I brought up the subject of drug use as recently as six months ago," he said.

Does he feel bad that he could not do more to help Jackson? "With hindsight, one can feel and say so many things," he said with a sigh. "In a way, this was coming, and it's frustrating that we couldn't do anything about it. But it is the person, who is suffering who should take the initiative and the people around him, the doctors who let him have the prescription drugs should have acted honorably."

He said in another interview: 'The problem has been going on for a long time but we didn't know what to do. There were attempts at intervention, and it didn't succeed.'

He also said Grace Rwamba, the nanny of Jackson's children repeatedly contacted him with concerns about Jackson's drug use but Jackson avoided his calls whenever the subject came up.

As many times as Jackson would candidly confess that he had a problem, the conversation always ended with a deflection and denial, Chopra said. As Chopra was writing his blog, the reports of Jackson's drug abuse were spreading across news channels. 'The instant I heard of his death this afternoon,' he wrote, 'I had a sinking feeling that prescription drugs would play a key part.'

Chopra and his family are trying to remember the humanity and music of Jackson but they are not glossing over his troubles and the price celebrities often pay. Chopra's thoughts are also very much with people who were close to Jackson and who are also known to Chopra.

'His children's nanny and surrogate mother, Grace Rwamba, is like another daughter to me,' he remembers in his blog. 'I introduced her to Michael when she was 18, a beautiful, heartwarming girl from Rwanda who is now grown up. She kept an eye on him for me and would call me whenever he was down or running too close to the edge. How heartbreaking for Grace that no one's protective instincts and genuine love could avert this tragic day.'

What were the closest moments Chopra has had with the late Jackson? Jackson wanted to produce a book to sell primarily as a concert souvenir, Chopra said, going back to the 1990s. "It would contain pictures for his fans but there would also be a text consisting of short fables," he recalled. "I sat with him for hours while he dreamily wove Aesop-like tales about animals, mixed with words about music and his love of all things musical. This project became Dancing the Dream after I pulled the text together for him, acting strictly as a friend. It was this time together that convinced me of the modus vivendi Michael had devised for himself: to counter the tidal wave of stress that accompanies mega-stardom, he built a private retreat in a fantasy world where pink clouds veiled inner anguish and Peter Pan was a hero, not a pathology."

Chopra introduced Jackson to his editor at Doubleday which published the book in 1992 with an impressive pressrun of 150,000 copies. The book was a success but Jackson felt it could have become a bigger success.

"There is renewed interest in the book now that he is gone," Chopra said. "The book could soon be reissued. There was a feeling that people did not really understand at the time what Michael was trying to show through the poems and reflections. It requires a higher consciousness to appreciate the thoughts in the book This time around people may look deeply into the book -- and into themselves."

....So what are we looking for in this world. We are doing the same thing as our elders did, We born,grown,died. In this journey many of us doing same thing as we did in past. when we are gonna awaken about this and start doing what we must do ?

Michael Jackson - May God bless your soul.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Happy Birthday Appaji........
























Dad, Your hand may not be with us,
But your smile,guidance, memories and teachings,
makes you to be with us life after life.
I am confident that I will hold this hand again and again.....

----outfromdeep

Happy Birthday DAD [appaji] [On 26th June]


Wednesday, June 24, 2009

journey called left n right....



On 23/06/2009,
this grateful day, I was burned-out completely. After I done with my work, I am on way to Sweet Home. Around 8:30 PM, We were sitting on the last seat of bus. Can't explain the kind of escalation I was getting at that time. Pain in my ass thanks to the our govt. buses which keeps its passenger awaken even at midnight. It's always reminds us a great person [Robert Frost] proverb "I have miles to go before I sleep, I have miles to go before I sleep....".

Read more on http://journey2hbs.wordpress.com

Monday, June 22, 2009

never never give up........


All men and women are born, live, suffer and die;
what distinguishes us one from another is our dreams,
whether they be dreams about worldly or unworldly things,
and what we do to make them come about...
We do not choose to be born.
We do not choose our parents.
We do not choose our historical epoch,
the country of our birth,
or the immediate circumstances of our upbringing.
We do not, most of us, choose to die;
nor do we choose the time and conditions of our death.
But within this realm of choicelessness,
we do choose how we live.

---- Joseph Epstei

Sunday, June 21, 2009

missing u appaji...


I lost my father, lost my appaji a long time back.Still I miss him,miss him so much... When I find none to counsel me when I need.His experience and judicious decision helped me a lot. I was so comfortable under him,as if I was under a Banyan tree under his
shadow,protected me from rain,scorching sun of life.The Banyan tree is no longer there and I am drenching in rain and burning in the scorching sun.None like him is by my side.I will miss him. Dunno how my life will end without him.

Even after my death my soul wants to be with u forever. Your smile always made my day.
Without u by my side, now I lost how to smile.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

wandering thoughts

The fact that your life is difficult..
.....doesn't give you the right choose,
Don't complain about the path you choose.

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

Follow your dreams..........

Always Follow Your Dreams

There were once 2 brothers who lived on the 80th level. On coming home one day, they realized to their dismay that the lifts were not working and that they have to climb the stairs home.

After struggling to the 20th level, panting and tired, they decided to abandon their bags and come back for them the next day. They left their bags then and climbed on. When they have struggled to the 40th level, the younger brother started to grumble and both of them began to quarrel. They continued to climb the flights of steps, quarreling all the way to the 60th floor.

They then realized that they have only 20 levels more to climb and decided to stop quarreling and continue climbing in peace. They silently climbed on and reached their home at long last. Each stood calmly before the door and waited for the other to open the door. And they realized that the key was in their bags which was left on the 20th floor.

This story is reflecting on our life…many of us live under the expectations of our parents, teachers and friends when young. We seldom get to do the things that we really like and love and are under so much pressure and stress so that by the age of 20, we get tired and decided to dump this load.

Being free of the stress and pressure, we work enthusiastically and dream ambitious wishes. But by the time we reach 40 years old, we start to lose our vision and dreams. We began to feel unsatisfied and start to complain and criticize. We live life as a misery as we are never satisfied. Reaching 60, we realize that we have little left for complaining anymore, and we began to walk the final episode in peace and calmness.

We think that there is nothing left to disappoint us, only to realize that we could not rest in peace because we have an unfulfilled dream …… a dream we abandoned 60 years ago.

Follow your dreams, so that you will not live with regrets.